Finding the purple undies outside of Chili’s last night reminded me of this story. Way back in the dark ages when I was dating dirt-bag boy, I got a call from my sister somewhere between 11pm and midnight. Bernadette needed to take herself to emergency and wanted to know if I could go over and stay w/her kids. It just so happened that I could. My kids were all in bed sleeping and dirt-bag was at my apartment. I told him to just stay put till I got back and flew over to Bern’s townhouse, she only lived a couple miles away. There was a stop sign 1/2 way to her place and of course I stopped at it and I happened to look down at the street. What I saw made me chuckle and I put the car in park, jumped out of my car, grabbed the thing on the street and threw it in my backseat and then got back in and continued to Bernadette’s townhouse as quickly as I could.
That was the night Bernadette found out that she has asthma. Sean and Bridget were asleep and didn’t wake up and it really didn’t seem that long before Bernadette came back. Actually, I was surprised at how quick it was. Bernadette came back to her home, I left and went out to my car and smiled when I looked at what was in my backseat. I drove home, grabbed the street find and walked up the 32 steps to my apartment, walked in and thanked dirt-bag for staying with my children and then mentioned “oh, by the way I have a present for you…I found this and it reminded me of you”. Then I presented it to him.
We’ve all seen these, we’ve probably all driven over them dozens of times in our lives. Random articles of clothing flattened on the street. We could make up stories from here to forever on how they got there (I do that) and probably never be right. Personally, I don’t believe I’ve ever been in a car where a sock or a shoe or mitten or a shirt has been either tossed out of or flown out of the window by accident. This was a shirt.
Okay, it wasn’t just a shirt. I was a very flat, stiff, dirty male’s dress shirt but hey, it was striped. I pretended to not understand the look I received in exchange for this glorious gift. “No, no, really, take this home and wash it a hundred times or so and it’ll be fabulous. This will look great on you!” I know, do that with a straight face. So I sent him home with the thanks for staying with my children and the shirt and amazingly enough…I never did see him wear that shirt. My goodness, some people just don’t appreciate anything.
Yes, I do amuse myself.